badassmccall:

if someone asks if youre wearing the same jeans as you wore yesterday and you are just say “have you ever heard of a washing machine” because they will think that you washed them but you are actually just assessing their knowledge of basic household appliances

(Source: cosimaniehaus223)

crash-mcbarason:

to people that sleep with their bedroom doors open:you are brave but you are going to die young

meruz:

sha la la la la my oh my 

i dont really have an explanation for this

bonusvampirus:

poogie-bear:

allies insisting that theyre part of the LGBTQAI+ acronym is like someone insisting that their name should be in the credits of a movie they had nothing to do with

"I spent money to go SEE the movie, didn’t I??? Without the support of fans like me, who pay to go see movies, movies wouldn’t even exist!!!!1" 

boy-code:

do u ever just cup your own boob

spangefucker:

do u ever just think what would have happened if u lived closer to someone

madeagoestohell:

i wonder if anyone has ever peed in the olympic pool

(Source: nardvvuar)

laughbitches:

clannyphantom:

how was everyone’s easter???

i fucked an egg

tffnyblws:

thesharpestdildos:

what if you were in school and the entire cast of icarlys dead bodies just fell from the ceiling and all you heard was “rANdoOOoOM DANCigNGN”

WHAT THE FUCK ARE U EV EN TAL K IN G AB OUT

(Source: pilotstwentyone)

john watson being badass (requested by sextective)

(Source: mycroftly)

Artist: Shrek
Track: "Shrek Ringtone"
Plays: 98,448 plays

ex-vengeance-demon:

I made this into a ringtone for my phone, and I thought I’d share it.

smoteymote:

therippedpage:

donttouchmyprndl:

anchorsawaysetsail:

homoarigato:

first kiss: queer women

this is infinitely cuter than that strangers kiss for a clothing label ad or homophobes hug gay people video

This is so adorable and makes me happy

This is literally the cutest thing ever.

Oh god so fucking adorable.

THIS IS FUCKING GREAT

deltheor:

★ Shiny Fire-Type Starter Pokémon

Separate Photosets: [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x]

Artist: Idina Menzel / Rick Astley - Mashup
Track: "Never Gonna Let It Go"
Plays: 33,471 plays

wildlark:

I saw a comedic opportunity and I fucking took it.

vividroute:

Let’s Play ep.99